Thursday, December 29, 2005

NERDS. they used to be cool, what happened?

THOSE NERDS! They're affecting our movies, man. Haven't you noticed? I swear those tech-nerd-bastards swayed Lucas to the dark side of pure eye candy. Every movie you see now is a game friendly, gadget thrusting commercial for R*dio Sh*ck.

You see, nerds used to be cool when they read books and adjusted their belts and glasses interchangedly. Sure "interchangedly" is not a word- how did you know?
What is a nerd?

NERD: noun, informal: "a foolish or contemptible person who lacks social skills or is boringly studious." (1950's origin unknown)

Basically, when a test was coming up, you knew where to look. This is a cliche... a 1950's - to late 1980's cliche that died around grunge when Kurt Cobain arrived on the scene. Yeah, Elvis Costello broke some barriers but Kurt really killed it.

The nerd took solace in grunge. They found that they could finally wear their granny sweaters and big glasses while stepping out of their mother's basement for Mountain Dew and Fig Newtons without fear of a wedgee. You see, they may even be confused as a popular musician themselves:

"Why yes, I am in a band...I'm also a level 10 elf, but...I also play bass.., my good lady...hmmm"

Okay, they were cool, but now....what redeeming qualities do nerds have today? The 00's nerd is a real let down. They have no attention span. They don't seem to know a whole lot about anything except things they can't explain.

The 00's nerds consume and consume and consume, much like locusts...driving markets in every boring way that glitters. Mediocracy has won the war, with video games! F*cking nerds. Why can't they stand up, sit down and read again? Go back to being nerds, please.
Oh, jerks are really in now...

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