Friday, November 18, 2005

HOBO CONTRIBUTIONS


Hmm, well let's see...If it weren't for the hobo, um, did they invent stew? I know they invented the handkerchief tied to a stick thing. Did they invent clowns? The early clown does invoke "hobo" does it not? I'm going to be the first to say, they invented clowns. I must admit, contempt is building inside me for the hobo as I write...

A surly breed, The Hobo. They gave us stew, red with white poke-a-dotted handkerchiefs on a stick and clowns. Yeah, I think that's about it. But, it goes without saying that they were a catalist for better locks and better fences...which they inscribed little symbols on- to help other passing hobos detect suckers, judges, "widers" (widows), church folk and so forth. Yeah, personally I'm a little mixed when it comes to hobos. I wouldn't want to meet the new generation '00's Bush era hobo. I think they have names like "Claws" & "Fist Cramin' Vern" & "Stranglin' Lonnie".

Please feel free to leave your favorite hobo name in the comment section, real or made-up or both.

P.S. The last blog entry, Tina Schlieske's CD release party, I threatened my Minneapolis friends that I would publically skewer them on this blog if they didn't go to the show.

Hence:

THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE HAVE MADE-OUT WITH HOBOS:

Bill K. made-out with known hobo: "Lou Brown Boogers"
Chris H. went to 3rd base with known hobo: "Count Crapula"
Andy A. shared passions with known hobo: "Poop Stains Willie"
Scott N. turned a trick by moonlight with known hobo: "Stink Eye Roy"
John B. rolled around with known hobo: "Goober Face Ed"
Eric H. did it with known hobo: "Hog Mouth Gil"
Page W. canoodled intamately with known hobo: "Fish Crotch Mary" (lucky)

Ta,

BuyourcardsatNewburyComicsVirginMegastoresUrbanOutfittersPullMyDaisy,

-eEvilyn Didley Scott

2 comments:

eEvilyn Diddley Scott said...

Let us not forget one more Hobo contribution:

Hobo Signs & Symbols

"......The classic American hobo of early this century communicated through a basic system of marks--a code through which they gave information and warnings to their fellow Knights of the Road. Usually, these signs would be written in chalk or coal on a trestle, fence, building or sidewalk, letting others know what they could expect in the area of the symbol."

Check them out:
http://www.slackaction.com/signroll.htm

Anonymous said...

Don't forget the all-time hero hobo, Willie Sands. Well, me and brother made him up when I was 7. It was funny.